My Life Issues

These works remind a family to rely on God as they care for children with special needs.

It's early morning, and most of the houses in Muskego, Wis., are still dark and quiet; but inside one house the hum of oxygen machines and medical pumps can be heard. Just down the hall, a clock reads 4:30 A.M. The alarm sounds, signaling the start of another busy day for Ginger and Richard Braam. As they get ready for the challenges that lie ahead, Ginger reads the handwriting on a small, faded piece of notebook paper taped to her bathroom mirror: "Ginge, with God all things are possible. Love, Richard." For the past 22 years these words have served as a daily reminder for her: God is in charge. Rely on him and trust in his plan.

Getting five special-needs children ready for the day is quite a production at the Braam household. Respiratory equipment, heart monitors, feeding tubes, overhead lifts, and specialty medications are just some of the things that can be found in their seven-bedroom home. "In the morning, it's a mad rush to get everyone up," says Ginger. "We get some of the kids ready for school, some ready for therapy, and some have medical appointments. Everybody's on their own schedule."

Almost all of the kids—Josh, 28; Jennifer, 17; Linda, 15; Brenden, 10; and Eric, 6—were adopted as infants. In addition to emotional, physical, and mental disabilities, the children also have severe medical conditions including profound cerebral palsy, spina bifida, and hyperactivity. "All of our children have had a rough start," says Ginger, "but they've improved. The doctors are amazed when we go [in for checkups]. They're amazed at what the love of a family can do."

How did their family get to be so big? Ginger says, "It kind of evolved. It was God's plan for us, because it took a whole lot of things to move us in this direction." The Braams started out as a blended family—Richard had two sons, Ginger had a daughter, and they had two children together. "We had always talked about having more children, and the possibility of adopting, but we didn't really pursue that," says Ginger.

It wasn't until Richard switched jobs that the idea resurfaced. He started working in group homes, and soon he and Ginger were involved with several of the activities for disabled adults. Eventually the Braams applied to become an adult family home. "After doing that for about four or five years, we were told there was an infant who had extreme medical problems that needed a foster care home," says Ginger. The Braams took the little boy in and have been caring for children with special needs ever since. "I counted once—more than 40 children and adults have come to us through respite care, foster care, or adoption," she says.

By mid-morning nurses are bustling about, helping the kids with their daily routines. "We have a lot of people coming into our home to serve the children," says Ginger. Vendors come weekly to drop off supplies and fill oxygen tanks. Physical and occupational therapists arrive periodically to work with the children. Nurses are in and out. "Sometimes it's almost like we're running a miniature hospital," says Ginger. "But I try to look at it as an opportunity to [witness]. Maybe that's why God brings so many challenges into our lives—maybe he wants that person, whomever we're working with, to come to know Jesus."

Eric, their youngest son, goes to public school every day and does his fair share of witnessing there. "Eric has every Christian videotape memorized," shares Ginger. "Although he is hyperactive and has trouble focusing, he can sing his little heart out! He goes to school and he sings all of his Jesus songs there. One day he stood up and told his classmates, 'All of you have to believe in Jesus!' "

She continues, "God has certainly used him as a witness. . . . He's singing God's praises and all those people are hearing it. I think that's just really something special, like topping on a cake. So it's not always what we can do for these children; a lot of it is what they can do for us."

As the afternoon settles in, volunteers start dropping by to take the kids for walks, read books to them, chat, or play games. "It is really a great time when people visit and we can have Christian fellowship in the process," says Ginger. "It's also good for the children to have some sense of community because many of our kids are homebound and don't get out except for medical appointments." This also gives Richard and Ginger some down time so they can take care of errands and household tasks.

Even with volunteers and helpers, however, providing round-the-clock care can take its toll. "There have been times when I felt alone and overwhelmed; but I just took one day at a time and relied on God," says Ginger. "God is the answer. I talk to God all day long—I can't imagine going through a day without him! Jesus is my very best friend."

The Braams work to instill that thought in their children, too. "The most important thing we can give these children is God's Word, and he will take care of the rest."

Ginger and Richard are amazed at how God has worked to bring them to this point in their lives. "God just moved us forward and edged us along, and this is where we ended up," shares Ginger. "We feel really blessed to have this opportunity. My mother always looks at me and says, 'I can't believe you do this.' I used to be the most finicky child. I couldn't even change a diaper or stand the sight of someone drooling. Now I live with it. What's the explanation of that? It's God! He changes you and molds you into what he wants you to be."

Although their caregiving situation is unique, the Braams say they are just like other families. "We meet the same challenges that everyone else meets out there," says Ginger. "It seems like a lot of people say we have a gift, or put us up on a pedestal for doing this every day. But we're in life just like everybody else. We're in the trenches. We have our day-to-day battles; some are spiritual and some are physical. . . . but somehow God sees us through."

Ginger says caring for others—especially those that can't care for themselves—has truly been a blessing. "You change your lifestyle and learn what sacrifice and commitment is. You learn to appreciate what Jesus did for you. He did an awful lot more than what we could ever do for these children." By caring for others, she says, we get to sample a small piece of what Jesus did for us.

Author: Alicia Neumann
Copyrighted by WELS Forward In Christ © 2009